jungkook playing with his lip ring (ノ°Д°）ノ︵ ┻━┻
You said you’d always be there but you’re not
You left me the moment I said something you didn’t like. You left me without a care for how I felt. You left me while telling me you didn’t care how I felt.
But the truth is I felt you slip away long ago.
Years filled with memories and me always being there for you but always feeling like I cared more about this friendship than you did.
You say I replaced you but you were the one who threw me away for being too worried. I guess I’m always too worried for you because you never do.
The moment you made new friends you left me behind but I can’t say I didn’t expect it. I am always left behind, I am always just kept around because I stick around when no one else does. I’m so sick of being hurt by the people I love, I’m so sick of caring too much for people who don’t feel the same. I stayed up at nights crying my heart out because I was worried about you and thought you were going to hurt yourself. I made a point to always be there no matter what and you throw me away. But you tell me I’m the one who abandoned you.
I guess I’m sorry. sorry for caring, sorry for the nights I didn’t sleep because I stayed awake for you. Sorry for crying when you were dying right in front of me for so long. Sorry for making a point to always be there when you weren’t for me. Sorry for trying to keep you from shattering yourself.
You don’t even acknowledge what you did and that hurts more. You called me and told me you didn’t care about my opinion and how I felt not just about that guy you were talking to but for everything. You don’t acknowledge that you made new friends and forgot about me. You don’t acknowledge calling me telling me about your new best friend. You don’t acknowledge that it felt like you rubbed it in my face that you were getting better while I was getting worse and when I tried to vent to you like you usually let me you blew me off instead. I spent so long trying to blow it off like it was nothing or it was just your bpd saying the hurtful things.
7 years of friendship. 7 years of caring for you more than anyone else. 7 years of feeling like you kept me around to boast yourself up.
But I abandoned you?
Do you know how much it hurts being thrown away by you. How much it hurts seeing you being better friends with mine that I ever could. Seeing everyone wanting you and no one ever wanting me or even remembering I exist. How much it hurts to be told I threw you away when you forgot I even existed. How much it hurt when you told me these things. How much it hurts to be told by the person I love most in the world that nothing I say matters? You were my best friend and you broke my heart more than anybody ever could. Do you realize how much I miss you. But you don’t miss me because I don’t exist in your world anymore.
I am a ghost to you and I see you watching my social media I see you seeing me fall apart and missing you. Do you even begin to realize how much I loved you.
